Surviving Your Wedding – A Guys Guide

Surviving Your Weddingonline casino

Here are some tips for future grooms as you prepare for your wedding:

If she says she wants a small wedding. marry her immediately do not pass go do not collect 200 dollars.

Saying things really romantic like, “I'm just excited to say I do and spend the rest of my life waking up next to you” have no effect. The marketing machines have hammered a large wedding into her head. You can't win. No, I'm sorry. You CAN'T WIN.

Realize that while she wants you to be involved in the wedding, she doesn't actually want your opinion.  Never the less, you need to be there to be “involved.”

Speaking of opinion, you probably don't have one, especially when it comes to table center pieces, flowers, invitations. DO NOT say “I don't care.” Instead ask which one she likes and agree with  her.

Also, never say things like “It's YOUR wedding, it is ALWAYS OUR wedding. Not THE wedding, its OUR WEDDING.

Under no circumstances ever should you ever refer  to your wedding as a “Dog and Pony Show.” This will not go over well. 🙂

Check Please!

rapelay144.jpg

I'm typically a hard person to find speechless, but when my Ethics teacher presented us a blog posting about a Japanese video game called “Rapelay”  where the goal of the games was to rape women and force them into having abortions. I grew up playing Monopoly and operation.  I was speechless.

I mean how does that go down? Does Hop Sing come running and and go “I've got a great idea for a game where YOU can be the rapest,” and everyone goes “By george he's got it!” I mean seriously. How does this have a market so that people would even ponder the thought of creating it in the first place? What's next Old McDonald's Bestiality Video Game?

I suppose if I stand up and say, “I embrace free speach, and I embrace other cultures, but this is messed up” I'm going to be labeled “judgemental.” If this is the case, what would be classified as wrong?

I just know at this point, I've seen enough. It's sad, and I feel ashamed to be human. I want off the planet. “Check please!” lets box it up and get out of here.

My Imaginary Friend

My Imaginary Friend - Great Gazoo

When I was growing up I was always amazed at how adults were fascinated about me having an imaginary friend. So I made up a friend that made no sense (he lived on top of a water tower). This delighted the adults. The more ridiculous the story, the more they would laugh, and I like to make people laugh so I would occasionally indulge them and talk about “Fako.”

Our fascination with fake people continues as “Reality TV” shows makes “Stars” out of people (with their fake nails, fake boobs, fake lips, fake tatoos, fake hair, fake tan) who come on the show and try to “keep it real.” The only thing real about reality TV is that IT'S NOT REAL.

This was partly due to Ozzy Osbourne as his show seems crazy. Well guess what folks, Ozzy is NUTS. This is why his show worked, and why almost every show after it has not.

Now we have Rock Of Love (with Brett Michaels from the band Poison). This time its for real.

Where are the real people. Where are the heroes for our children to look up to?

Music By Top Johnny from the Podsafe Music Network “Keep it Real.”